A Body

When do I belong to me?

I cut my thumb flipping through a magazine

Where beauty meets magic 

At the right dollar amount

Glitter and possibility designated for few

I wince at their smiles—

Those who laugh at my misfortune

The fantasy of romance is cut up into mannequin pieces

Am I supposed to look like that?

Easily broken and decorated?

When I had a grin full of growing teeth

I belonged to the Sun

Galivanting endlessly

But aging invites the thirst of external validation

Mostly regulated indoors

Painfully separating from the only entity that saw my carefree nature

Thus began a cycle of belonging to everyone’s needs but my own

I cried out to the Moon

Grateful for night’s beauty

But pleading for the balance of sunshine again 

I lost my way…

I used to dance alongside my imagination

Would marvel at my thoughts

But find myself buried under the intentions 

of others

Blinded by expectations

Disguised to make sure I am palatable

A break of sunlight emerges through my bedroom window

I sit in its warmth

Hugging my old friend

Knowing it will guide me

Day by day

I’m able to see myself

I see the cuts and bruises

Loving the spaces my parents’ embrace couldn’t reach

A body returning home